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I used to be a high performer, but for the past few months I’ve been really struggling. My manager and I are constantly arguing, but I know that he’s right and I hate that. I can’t seem to get anything done because I can never scrounge up the motivation to do anything. Projects that normally would have taken me a few days are taking weeks, and I still can’t bring myself to finish them. I leave work feeling like a failure pretty much every day.
He’s a good manager and is saying all of the right things, which just makes me feel extra awful for snapping at him. He wants me to take a leave of absence to get rid of me. I don’t know how I got here. I’m afraid of losing my job. I’m not sure how I get out of this and start being good at my job again.
I don’t think your manager is trying to get rid of you by recommending a leave of absence. I think you have a smart manager who cares about you, and I’d probably also recommend that you should take the leave. If you’re feeling this miserable, it’s time to consider if this is burn out or anxiety or depression. There are a lot of possibilities that could be making you feel this way, and your manager probably isn’t the right person to help you figure this out. If you were previously a high performer, you can be again. It sounds to me like your mind and your body is telling you to slow down for a bit first.
Managers aren’t mental health professionals. Emotional support is part of the gig, undoubtedly, but there’s only so far managers are trained to go. Knowing your limits there is an important part about being a manager. I can let you talk it out, help coach you through conflict, and balance your workload to match your ability. I can guide you through company policies, walk you through options, or offer a different perspective on a situation.
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